snapshots

Sometimes we share moments that we want to freeze in time.  To hold a Polaroid photo of that feeling in our hands and remember it in its entirety even as it yellows and fades.  They are moments of epiphany, moments of joy, and moments of beauty.  When you hug your firstborn tight to your chest and breath in that feeling of love, anxiety, and peace all at the same time while standing in a dimly lit hospital room.  Or that second of delight when reach the summit of a long-awaited hike.  Often they are simple moments of togetherness-- when your family is all tucked tight in their beds while a gentle snow falls beyond the window.  I myself have moments such as these, and all contain the company and companionship of those I love.

Tonight I was reminded of those moments as I watched The Book Thief with my friend/roommate/blessing Kait.  It is late at night on the day before my last final, and probably the last place I should be is a movie theater.  But there we were, and there our hearts were changed.  There was beauty on the screen-- in color, speech, music, scenery, wardrobe, expression-- it was seemingly flawless in its simplicity.  The masterpiece brought us the fresh perspective we needed.  And that's my raving review of The Book Thief.  Do yourself a favor, and see it.

Being happy and other virtues

This is how you become the best you can be, which will undoubtably bring happiness.  

For example: Something you're passionate about is life.  So become immensely interested in it, and continue to let that interest grow.  Look around you and see the beauty of the world.  Keep your head up and see the people around you.  Lift them, and allow them to lift you.  Foster life-long relationships with others, and don't let petty things keep you from holding fast to those friendships.  Call your family members, both close and estranged, and ask them how they are doing.  Learn about other cultures and develop a respect for them.  Eat good food and go on long walks.  Find yourself in the mountains with good people and a good view.  Read books, and then read some more books, so that you can have more insight to things around you.  Look down from the tops of man-made skyscrapers God's peaks and canyons.  Admire the beautiful artwork and architecture around us, and immerse yourself with beautiful melodies and music that move the soul. 

These are just a few ways to show that you appreciate this life you've been given.  Be grateful.

And doing this doesn't ensure that there will be no bad days or hard times, but it does make those times less bad and less hard.  It gives you things to be grateful for even in moments of distress and sorrow.

self•ish

College is the prime time for being selfish.  It is the most self-absorbed period of everyone's lives, when they are on their own with no one else to look out for.  If I wanted to, I could spend all day without even talking to another person.  I don't have to look at anyone, talk to anyone, and especially help anyone.  I have my own worries, my own schedule, and my own issues to take care of.

However, it is also the perfect time to serve others. Because we are on our own and surrounded by so many people, we are given countless opportunities to lift others up.  Everyone is going through hard times; everyone has troubles and stresses.  It's not hard to look around and find someone in need, whether it be a roommate, classmate, ward member, etc.

This being said, it's the times when we are consumed with ourselves that we are the most UNhappy.  When I'm caught up in my outfit, watching episode after episode of netflix and just sitting in my own comfort, I am indifferent and quite unhappy.  But when I'm stressed about class and trying my best and I'm staying out late and waking up early and surrounded by people but also have time to myself and I'm going to the gym and doing my visiting teaching and looking for the good in each day and learning from the bad; that's when I'm happiest.  When I'm working hard.

These make for the best days.

I've discovered the secret to life

I guess that this is not the secret to every life-- but it is the secret to a happy life.

It's so simple that I think it goes over most people's heads, and maybe that's why it's taken me so long to figure it out.  It'll probably take me even longer to implement in my life.

The secret is to be happy with where you're at.  I know it sounds too simple-- but anyone can paint something simple to to look complicated.  The truly difficult and artful thing is to make something complicated become simple.

Being at college it is easy to sit back and observe others that are making mistakes (I guess that's easy to do pretty much anywhere, but I've noticed it in particular here at BYU.  I think this is because everyone is vulnerable and away from home).

I have friends that never seem to be happy.  Whether we are at a game, a dance, or just relaxing as friends; they can not feel content.  The grass is always greener, or the Instagram picture always looks better.  Truly happy people are content, with both who they are and where they are.  Not to say that we shouldn't all work for progression; but it is important that we are happy where we are.

--Obviously Passenger is on the same page as me.  Listen to the "Let Her Go" lyrics.  I rest my case.--

And now a warm welcome to this coming winter.  May we make it a good one.  

Work Hard, Play Hard (and a happy Wednesday)

My new philosophy (drum roll please...)

WORK HARD, PLAY HARD.

So I had probably heard this saying .2 million times in my life.  But now it finally rings true!  I realize that in order to do all of the things that I want to do, I first need to do all of the things that I need to do.  For example, Monday I spent a good five hours in the third floor activity room doing nothing but straight up homework (but of course I did have some episodes of Psych playing in the background).  I finished all of my math homework, studied for my Conflict Resolution test, researched for my Issues Paper, and wrote my Islamic and Judaism Survey paper.  It was rough but productive!  And after, what did I do? (cue the lively background music)

I played hard!  I went shopping, worked out, got some good food, and relaxed for a while.  Then I went to bed EARLY.  Weird.  I know.  It was the absolute best.  I will do the same this week, so that this weekend I will be a free woman.  Happy Wednesday y'all!

College looks good on us

Perhaps you think that college changes a person.  That the moment your parents drop you off and drive away, you jump in the air and suddenly become a mature grown-up.  Or at least that's what I thought.  However, I have come to accept the fact that growing up is a slooooow process.  Honestly... this whole maturity thing comes "line upon line, precept upon precept."

Here's some visual proof of how we really haven't changed at all.

See, we really haven't changed at all from this ↑

The Killers, Billy Joel, and that's all

So I'm sitting in the JSB just waiting to go to my next class.  I always look forward to this hour I have to chill here (literally chill... this building is freezing).  And right now I am just watching tired, content faces while listening to The Killers radio on Pandora.

--hold on right now while i pause to change the song

Okay now that Take Me Out by Franz Ferdinand is playing... you have my full attention.

I'm going to my Conflict Resolution class in ten minutes.  It's one of my favorite classes; I always leave feeling happy and having gained so much insight into myself.  It's a good class for self-reflection.

--this song is making me want to be on Senior Trip in Newport... good beat and a beachy touch w/ a little hard rock goin on.

Back to Conflict Resolution... It's all about learning how to see others as people that are equal in worth to ourselves.  Rather than seeing others as objects or obstacles, I am working on always making others feel special.  It's a life-long process, but I realize that everyone I look up to is good at this particular thing.

--oh... switched to Billy Joel Radio.  My Life is playing.  Kind of giving me a New York fever.  I really want to see NY in the fall.

Well I'm off to class.  This was a nice moment of nostalgia and looking to good times ahead.  Love my family-- always thinking about them.  And now I'll walk away to class while listening to Don't go Breaking My Heart (Elton John version of course.  Not Anne freakin Hathaway).

Sundance

So today we made a spontaneous trip to Sundance resort.  It was perfect timing, because we are all pretty stressed out about tests and life and lack of boyfriends and whatnot.  So we took off up the canyon to find pretty leaves and crisp air.

We were in a good place with good company.  It was so nice to get away from campus and enjoy the autumn weather.  Also-- the lodge there is so cozy.  I felt exactly like I was in Hocus Pocus (family, you will be the only ones to appreciate that).

Enjoy.

And here's a little Throw Back Thursday to when I road the moonlight chairlift with Taite and her BF.  Don't be fooled-- I totally have a life.

days like this

On days like this-- when it is bitter cold outside and the sky looks ominous and gray-- all I want to do is curl up and eat some soup.  So I did.  I had a really good bowl of torilla soup from the Creamery on 9th.  After that, I decided to look at pictures of really beautiful places and make myself sick with jealousy over the fact that I wasn't there at that very moment.  Here are some of the scapes I was living through.

And that's when I realized that wishing I was somewhere else would only bring me unhappiness.  Because fantasizing and romanticizing a foreign place isn't going to change anything.  So I got out of bed and went for a walk.  And you know what happened?  I found beauty in the place that I am at RIGHT NOW.  The present was made beautiful, just because I was looking for it.  Pretty cool.  

Nice people at BYU

I generally like to avoid describing someone as "nice."  It just doesn't really tell a whole lot about the person.  But I honestly can't think of another word that better represents the people at BYU.  They are so nice.  No one walks around on their phones, usually I am the only one doing that.  They make eye contact and smile and say hello.  I hear "sorry" and "thank you" echoing all over campus!  I've really had to step up my game.

Some of those nice people are my roommates.  Good memories: every night Kait and Sarah and I do our homework in Sarah and mine's room.  Kait always sits at the foot of my bed and we laugh until we cry or wet our pants...

This is what I go to sleep to every night.

And Felicity of course...

***

And this is what I get to wake up to.

Still don't know who wrote me that note-- but it made my day!  Notice my drinks of choice (not easy to come by, I have to trek far off campus.  But I'm loyal to my DC).

This is how Sarah casually sits.  All the time. 

Oh how I love these nice people!

This one's for my mom

This one is for my mom, because I'm pretty sure she's the only person who really cares about what every day looks like for me.

 look at those blank faces

The testing center... it even looks scary

My favorite building-- the Maeser building

 Just sleeping under a tree.  It's casual.

 Getting some self-defense lessons.  No big deal.  

My walk to and from campus every day

 Sometimes at night I feel like I am at Hogwarts

My favorite time of day... 7:00pm

The classic shoe pic.  Because you were all dying to know what I had on my feet.

The classic food pic.  Because I know that mom is curious about what I eat every day.

Life lessons learned in one day

Just kidding, it took more than one day to learn this life lesson.  It took 5 stress-filled days and nights... but that just didn't roll as well for a title.

Okay so I recently had to take a test for my calculus class.  This was a pretest on all past things pertaining to calculus, and in order to remain in the class, a 75% was required on the test.  As you can imagine, I was freaking out.  I do not do math.  I do not like math.  I avoid math.

Or so I thought...

I recently discovered that if you spin something that you don't like into a positive thing, you can trick yourself into thinking that you really do enjoy whatever it is you don't like.  And eventually, you will like that something that you originally hated.  You follow?

For example-- if I were to hate blood more than anything, and feel ill just at the thought of a paper cut, then I would have to spin the thought of blood into a not-so-bad thing (I use this as an example because it is a personal experience I once had.  More details to come).  Or even better, spin it into an appealing thing.  I would pull out all of the cool things about blood, drawing particularly on what it is that I find interesting.  The key word here is interesting.  This differs for everyone.  But for me, I would say that blood is a miracle, and a gift.  And that I am blessed to have healthy blood.  Moreover, I would stress the fact that this is a challenge for me.  And every challenge gives us an opportunity to grow and develop our weaknesses into strengths.  So, by learning to love blood, and understand it more fully, I am overcoming one of my weaknesses, and therefore building a strength out of a challenge.  Make sense?

I tell this, because this is what I learned to do with calculus.  I told myself that it is like a puzzle.  And I love puzzles.  I told myself that it is my ultimate puzzle to solve, and that if I practice, I will get better and build upon my weaknesses.  I told myself that if I would ask for help from tutors in the math center every day, that it would help me to stay humble and also show a willingness to learn.  I would be showing obedience by doing all that I could possibly do in order to prepare for the test.  And I would learn how to do hard things, because later in life I will not have the option to back out of certain difficult tasks.  So that's how I spun it.  And now I actually enjoy math.

And that's the story of how I grew to love math.

I know... you were on the edge of your seats.

But this is why it is so important.  This is the "so what who cares?" part of my babbling.  I have just conquered one of the greatest tasks in life.  Learning to love what you do, even what what you are doing isn't something that you love.  Fact is, most of life is not easy.  And much of life is not fun.  There are many mundane things that just have to be done, and there's no way around it.  No matter how long I stare at the pile of dirty laundry that is accumulating at the foot of my bed, and no matter how much I don't want to wake up tomorrow morning at 6:00 o'clock to go running, it still needs to be done.  Otherwise I will turn into a smelly and out of shape marshmallow with dirty clothes.  But if I spin it into something enjoyable, then life continues to be fun (although I currently can't think of any way to spin those two particular things at this moment).  This is what makes a positive person. 

Honestly, my one regret is that there are not more hours in the day for me to spend pouring over the great works that I am surrounded by.  When it comes night, I don't want to go to sleep, because I feel so invigorated by the things that I am working on.  This is so exciting.   

You're welcome.

A view from my park bench

So I have decided that although college is NOT my first adventure- it is my grandest by means of beauty and challenge.  

The other day I sat on a bench in a patch of grass in the center of campus.  It was a hot day and my feet were about ready to fall off.  Under the shade of a tree whose leaves were just beginning to turn for autumn, I sat and watched.  I watched scared people searching for classes, frantic people calling their families, alma maters reliving fleeting memories, and returning students reuniting with old friends.  

And the longer I sat, the larger the magnitude of Earth's population grew, until it far surpassed my previous scope of vision.  

Our world is so vast, and shared by people with completely different perspectives.  However, we all depend upon the same basic needs.  And although I had seen this in Cambodia- I guess you could say I re-realized this truth.  That a world exists outside of myself.  Who would have thought?  Apparently the high school mentality is becoming uprooted.  For a mind as small and inexperienced as my own, this is a milestone.  And I think that is what the greatest adventure in life is.  Realizing that it's not all about your comfort, your needs, or your wants.  It's about what you can do to help others.  And Earth is a perfect place to look for people who are in need of something.  Particularly on a college campus.  After all-- we are all just trying our best here.  

Adventure: a bold, usually risky undertaking; hazardous action of uncertain outcome.

Bring it on.  

And for the record:  if you ever need a cleared head, organized thoughts, freshened perspective, slower blood pressure, stronger confidence, or just have sore feet-- grab a park bench.  It's my go to form of therapy.  Plus it's perfect for people-watching (which always has a way of making your problems feel really small in comparison to everyone else's).  

And now a shot of my favorite movie, featuring a park bench.  

The Vaudois of the Piedmont Valley

I have stumbled across perhaps the most interesting thing that has happened to me all summer.  While working on a sunday lesson, my mom was given a stack of papers from my cousin, and therein lied the history of our ancestors.  Late last night, after returning from dinner with some good friends, I came downstairs and asked to look at the documents of our predecessors.  In the lamplight I poured over them, and was soon enamored by the beauty of my heritage.  I searched late into the night for pictures and primary documents that would contain any information on the type of people I am descended from.  

Here is their story:

The Piedmont Valley in Italy is surrounded by the Cottian Alps, which serves as a border between Italy and France.  Three valleys run to the Piedmont plains, which are the valleys of Lucerna, Perouse, and San Martino.  In all they are about sixteen square miles.  And nestled in this Piedmont Valley are a wondrous sort of people.  The Vaudois, a race that has existed there since long before any historian could have archived their arrival, were striking in both appearance and attitude.  Their description goes as follows:

Within this little area has...existed from remote times a peculiar race of people, rarely numbering more than twenty thousand. They have retained their primitive appearance and manners to a greater degree than almost any other European community. They have always been noted for the simplicity and purity of their lives, and their absolute freedom from the ignorance superstition and vice which have cursed the countries around them. The men are tall, well-made, graceful in section, vigorous and hardy. The women are fair, endowed with a native grace and refinement and have always been noted for their chastity and modest deportment. Both sexes are frank, hospitable Peaceful and forbearing in disposition.

Traditionally these Vaudois or people of the Valleys belong to a church which is held to be the direct result of the teachings of the Apostles of early Christianity, never having belonged to the Roman Catholic religion. Thus they were the forerunners of the Reformation, having preserved their ancient faith, through the centuries, "in the Vaudois Valleys simple, free, and pure, as in the time of persecution."

How beautiful, don't you think?  They were persecuted for not joining the Catholic church and instead remaining faithful to the New Testament apostles.  And for this they fought an 800 year war against the Duke of Savoy and the pope.  Children were torn from their mother's arms and brutally murdered.  Bodies were skewered and left to demonstrate what being faithful would cause.  However, they never gave in.  After being scattered about Europe numerous times, they always returned to their home in the Piedmont Valley.  And after many unwavering generations, eventually were granted religious freedom.

In the early 1800s, President Snow (who was then Elder Snow) came to the Piedmont Valley to restore the everlasting gospel to the people of Italy.  He was inspired to do so, and found a humble and strong people who were open to the words of our future prophet.  My ancestors, the Cardons, were then baptized and later traveled to Utah in the pursuit of establishing Zion.

Marie Madelaine, daughter of Philippe Cardon and sister to Louis Philip, recounts having had a dream at a very young age, in which three men came to her and told her they were the servants of God.  They then proceeded to tell her all about the restored gospel.  When she awoke, she was acting very strange, and recounted the entire dream to her parents.  Being so young, she soon forgot the dream, but her parents always remembered.  And when their daughter was eighteen years old, the father heard of men in La Tour who were teaching a strange and new doctrine.  He walked all day and all night to the place where the men were, and recognized that their teachings were the same of those in his daughter's dream.  He invited the men back, offering his home to them as their new headquarters.  They accepted his offer.  And upon returning to his home, his daughter looked upon their faces, and suddenly recollected her entire childhood dream.  She knew that they were the same men.  All were later baptized.





◆How moving this is for me to see, and how I hope that they look down on us now, and see that their efforts have been paid in full.  Such gratitude I feel, that words cannot convey it.  I will see their faces again, and look forward to that day.  But for now, I will live the way that they have taught me.◆



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